day twenty. LAST ONE.

Ok...the LAST picture of my '20 days' that took me exactly a year and 2 days to finish .
I posted the first picture on 29th december year 2010 ... today is 31st december , year 2011 and this is the FINAL one ...





20. a photo of you when you were happy

grey is cranky

Can grey be good ... or is it just blurred out by a good mood when we have one ?
You hear so much people talking about their moods and the weather .. like the weather has something to do with our moods .... when it's rainy and grey we are cranky and when it's bright and sunny we are happy and funfilled
bad mood , good mood - could it ever be just a little about the weather , or do we just combine weather with mood ?
life is much more complicaed to just say ... grey day makes me cranky .
... if we overall have problems that bring us down , makes us cranky then it's more than obvious , the grey and rainy weather isn't making it better.
Though ofcourse ... in some cases , just the weather can make you cranky.
The weather brings displeasure which leads on to cranky . Simple as that.
It just leads me to wonder... to we make everything so much harder to ourselves , or is it really simple as that ?


I'm just gonna stop right there .... now you can see what I am thinking of at 3:17 am ....
how fun is that . Life's philosophy at THREE AM >__________>
Well , much better than replaying all the shit in my life over and over again . Not that my life is all shit . Just- could always be better .

ttyl,
Ansu.

Day nineteen.

19. a photo of someone you find attractive







Yep... I really do

Fire and Ice-it is now one.

Yeah , I know I haven't typed in ages ... sorry about that ! Just have been so busy or tired or just lazy ... Happens to the best of us . Still though , school school school ... what can I say ... it is driving me crazy . So much work and it literally steals my time ... I have only time for school and somehow practice ... Having a personal life , fucks everything up immidiately ... so ... I always have some repearing to do at school . Can't wait till it's all over .
Everything else has been weird and yeah, no words for it ... practice is crazy ... we perform so often so I have been really busy with dancing ...
personal side ... it exists ... It has been great and so much fun but at the same time it just causes a storm in my mind and body and heart ... sometimes I just don't know what to do . Everything has turned so complicated yet so easy . Feels like fire and ice have bonded...and somehow the fire won't melt the ice , ice won't put out the fire . The two extremes that are supposed to be so far from eachother are now so close .

My mind is still an idiot , as usual... I had something, something that was right there , but I didn't want it - now suddenly , I want it so bad , but I should have known , I can't have it anymore.

I keep wishing , hoping , holding on ... but how do I know - am I wishing too much ? ... is there any hope ? ... how long can I hold on ?

I am getting too cheesy , so I will finish now ... I will let you know , what happens , how my life goes :)
Don't forget me , and let's meet again !

~Ansu.

Day eighteen.

18.a photo of what you ate today.






Küpsisetort (kiivide , banaani ja nektariiniga) ;)

Mushrooming.

Hey guys .
So I thought it would be good to type again :)
since I am bored .
I didn`t go to practice today ... because someone wouldn´t come ... and Carmen aint there anymore so whats the point of going if it will be boring as hell . thereś nothing to do with Riin and Mae and others ... stella , signe ... some new ones I think ... well , obviously not . Quess I'ma go next time . If I bother .
So I used my morning to clean my laptop and keyboard instead . it took me about 2 hours ... I mean I literally cleaned my laptop like in the washing way . Now its all nice and clean :)
AAND I ate 4 pieces of(cookie)cake ...Z _ Z my breakfast :D and it's not my fault that it was so delicious .

Anyway ... I have no plans for today but me and Hanna were planning to go mushrooming tomorrow . To Riisipere ... So I think we will try to visit Tiiu aswell... if she's even at home Z _ Z
Haven't been to riisipere in years . I think it will be nice to see my chilhood home again :) ... though I will not be able to see my house . Since someone else is living there now ofcourse. Still , I think it will be fun . I havent gone mushrooming in ages aswell so ... forest , here we come . I will finally go somewhere I belong . Crazy woman in the woods (Y)
So yeah , that should be it . Everything else is pretty much school atm . 11th grade seems to be really hard .
See ya later .
~Ansu.

Day seventeen.

17.A photo of last summer

Ugh ... good times , good times. ;)